I Gave Pony Rides

Once we landed from our flight I parked the plane and the Shetland pony whinnied and leaped out and there were some kids hanging around and I gave them pony rides then left the airport heading into town but the road was closed because of mud and so I got the pony to pull me through it on a cardboard box.

We got downtown where I dropped the pony off at my aunt’s place in a sleazy hotel and then I got a bite to eat of some stuff that Anthony No Reservations on TV likes for food. I had a large pig-eating worm for a snack and they took my Visa card and gave me back a Master Charge as change.

The waitress was cool so I said I can take you away from all this and she said how and I said just watch so we walked out of there and flagged down a man driving a limo and we got in and we paid off the driver and took the limo over to Wendover where we got one of those roast horse buffet meals with some fried sheep’s eyes for appetizers and my date the waitress gobbled them up like they were rotten eggs.

a face like hitler

Once when I was an avid pilot I went out to the airport to fly and I thumbed a ride to get there. A lady said to me get into my car and she had huge lips they were so big you couldn’t see her nose and wanted to kiss me and gave me the big come on.

I shouted at her and said no through a bull horn that I had with me and it was battery operated and so she really got the message and swerved into oncoming traffic the noise was so upsetting to her. Finally she calmed down and I reached over to turn on the radio and she had a little cage filled with six rabbits where ordinarily a radio would be in the car but she didn’t seem to give a crap and kept feeding candy bars to the animals. Then she asked me if I wanted some and I said yah so she brought out a bag of dog chow and said “here chew on this,” in Chinese and I was stunned since she had a face like Hitler but not to worry I like roast beef.

So I finally made it to the airport where a buddy of mine with only four fingers on each hand was readying an airplane for me and I thought gee this is great and I got in it with my Shetland pony which was a pint sized animal and it loved flying and so away we went….to be cont.